What to Do If You Are Married to a Dream Stealer: Unevenly YOKED

Part ONE: Revealing the Dream Stealer

 

“Do not be unevenly yoked with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and lawlessness have in common? What fellowship has light with darkness?” 2 Corinthians 6:14

WHY DO PEOPLE GET MARRIED?

I have to believe that on the whole, men and women choose to get married initially for love. Even if you justify marriage by means of “companionship, fellowship, convenience, tradition, etc.”, any time two people go through the lengths it takes to get married by law and by the recognition of their peers- love IS involved – even if you do not “love” the person, most people “love” the IDEA of being married.

Marriage can mean many different things to different people. It can mean unconditional love partners to one, compatibility partners to another, and then of course best friend and motivators to most. Marriage is an awesome institution, and if you are anything like me, you have (or have had) nothing but the highest hopes in regards to marriage and being married.

But what happens when the honeymoon feeling goes away? What happens when after some time you find out that maybe you and your spouse aren’t on the same page? What happens when you are madly in love with someone, and for whatever reason, they don’t share in your vision and decide that they are going to love you to A POINT… but NOT in regards to your vision or what you feel is your purpose in life? Can you love someone, and be found going in two different directions? Is it possible to be married to a “dream stealer” and if so… what CAN you do?

 

DEFINING A DREAM STEALER

Let’s get ONE THING STRAIGHT, there is only ONE certified dream stealer, and he is called among other things; “SATAN, the devil, the father of all lies, the adversary, the accuser of the brethren”.   (Mark 1:13, 1 John 3:8, John 8:44, 1 Peter 5:8, Rev. 12:10) It is our position as Christians, that there are forces behind the scenes of every action, and that the enemy we are fighting is NOT our spouses, best friends, mothers or fathers but the devil himself.

We are fighting an invisible and yet forceful foe- THE DEVIL. People who become dream stealers have become accustomed to living in fear and doubt, and have allowed themselves to listen to the “father of all lies” instead of God the Father. As a result, they become molded into an outward representation of a sinning and fearful heart. Good people can become dream stealers, they can go to church, they can believe in God, but they will never be able to overcome their own fears on their own power. Understand please that the devil doesn’t care if you love God or not, he just wants you to be ineffective in your displays of that love for God. “Dream stealers” can be put in your life to try and keep you from accomplishing your God-given visions and dreams. These are the “dream stealers” that we need to be wary of, and these are the confused men and women who need to be prayed for, loved on and shown successes… anyway. What is the BEST way to shut a dream stealer up and convince him that DREAMS DO COME TRUE? SUCCEED ANYWAY.

DREAM STEALERS ARE: (Job 6:14-30)

  • Fickle, unreliable, and wavering
  • Not helpful
  • Critical
  • Dishonest
  • Sell out/tattle tales
  • Judgmental

JOB HAD A DREAM LIFE

Let us consider our brother Job. The Lord Himself was speaking to the dream stealer Satan and said, “Have you noticed my friend Job? There’s no one quite like him—honest and true to his word, totally devoted to God and hating evil.” (Job 1:8)

Yes, dear friends the Lord and Satan have had conversations and yes, Satan came to God the Father and the Lord allowed Satan to test Job. Did the Lord test Job … NO! The very premise of Job and his testing was the fact that the Lord was sure of Job and his integrity. Job has in result become immortal in the minds of men, as the man who was able to STAND THE TEST.

While Job eventually became victorious in his resisting of the enemy, he had one thing going against him. He had allowed FEAR into his heart. Job, while he was a dreamer, living a dream life, had given the devil a say in his life. I believe that THIS is why the devil knew that he could get to Job- and the devil knew that Job could and would suffer.

Anytime we allow a spot of fear in our hearts, we give the devil room to move in, and we give him all the material he needs in order to cause us great pain and suffering…

And Job said “For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.” Job 3:25

Job had a wife, children, land and riches. He was a prosperous man, but he was living with fear in his heart. The Bible says that he made sacrifices daily for his children’s safety and prosperity. He was a man concerned with his children, and their righteousness- so much so that he had crippled himself in doubt and fear.

The devil saw this weakness and exploited it. For the devil only sees our flesh, whereas the Lord saw Job’s heart and his strengths… as God chooses to only see the heart of a man. Some might think “Yes, but Job suffered none-the-less”, and in response you must realize that Job’s trials were NEVER about the flesh… but always about the heart.

 As dreamers, the Lord wants ALL OF US.

If you choose to be a dreamer of dreams, you must put God FIRST place in your heart and be disciplined enough to line up your actions (principles, duties, and responsibilities) with the love and desire for the Lord that you keep in your heart.

As we will cover later, Job’s trials ended IMMEDIATELY as soon as his heart changed towards his friends AND through his sacrifices and praying outwardly for THEM. His outer actions exemplified his inward actions of the heart.

ARE YOU A DREAMER… DO YOU HAVE A DREAM?

“And it shall come to pass in the last days, saith God, I will pour out of my Spirit upon all flesh: and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams:” Acts 2:17

DREAMERS ARE:

  • Dependable, reliable, stable
  • Helpful and encouraging
  • Empowering
  • Honest and upright
  • Loyal and trustworthy
  • Fair

Dreamers are not necessarily visionaries. Dreamers are men and women who do not choose to look at the negatives of life. True dreamers are men and women who have chosen to disregard the devil and ALL of his exploits and ploys. A dreamer knows in full confidence that the devil is THE LIAR and that in God ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE.

All Christians SHOULD be dreamers, but not all dreamers are Christian.

Dreamers in the world recognize that there is an ability to do ANYTHING when you have NO FEAR. While they are NOT going onto eternity, they have learned how to function in the here and now… FEAR FREE and without abandon. Men and women in the world who do not know Jesus, but have become successful- have done so FEAR FREE. They successfully steer clear of dream stealers by moving away from home early, getting divorced, leaving a company, etc. Lost people succeed through removing ALL dream stealers in their lives. As Christians- WE CAN NOT DO THIS… so then what do we do??

Be sure to read Part Two of this series tomorrow August 16, 2011… What to Do If You Are Married to a Dream Stealer: Unevenly YOKED Part TWO: Why Can’t I Just Divorce or Leave My Dream Stealer?

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