Feeling Loved… but Not Wanted?

For the LORD your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God. Deut 4:24


I was discussing today with someone I love deeply about this “always loved, never wanted” phenomenon. What could that possibly mean? In this modern-day there seem to be more and more people who always feel loved – but never feel wanted, people who feel perhaps as if their family/friends are always around, but that they have no vested interest into each others lives.

The best way I could explain it would be like living next door to your sister (you know she loves you), but then never seeing her or being given the opportunity just to “hang out” with her.

What is this disconnect? What is this modern-day incapacity to be able to show love through actual service and contact? The Bible says in the end times, “… people will be lovers of self and [utterly] self-centered, lovers of money and aroused by an inordinate [greedy] desire for wealth, proud and arrogant and contemptuous boasters. They will be abusive (blasphemous, scoffing), disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy and profane.” 2 Tim 3:2 AMP

It also says, “Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” Hebrews 10:25 NIV


While the world grows more and more divided and disconnected, today I would like to bring to your attention that God is a jealous God. What does that mean? It means: HE WANTS YOU, and HE WANTS YOU ALL TO HIMSELF.  If you are a person who has always felt “loved” but never wanted, I am here today to tell you that: GOD WANTS YOU. The Creator of ALL living things created you to FIRST be with Him, and secondly to serve others.  God plus a house, God plus a car, God plus a good job is NO match for God-alone because HE WANTS YOU and HE WANTS YOU TO WANT HIM TOO.

Serving a God who is jealous for you is very much like signing a legal non-compete document. What is a non-compete document? A non-compete is a paper that a company has you sign when you begin working for them. It limits you legally from EVER doing work with other companies in a competing field WHILE you are under your employers contract. For instance, if you worked for a potato chip company, and signed a non-compete, you would not be permitted to sell any competitors brand of chips EVER until your contract expires. When you became a Christian, you signed the contract of salvation on your heart- and with it you signed on to Christ and HIS message that there was NO OTHER way to God but through His Son Jesus the Christ and Messiah. Going and serving any other form of god, while you have contracted your heart and life to God- is a breach of your metaphorical contract. This causes calamity and it takes you out from under God’s wing of protection. Choosing to go against God, negates the decision that you made FOR God. It saddens His heart, and it grieves yours. Those who DESIRE to feel wanted: GOD WANTS YOU TO HIMSELF. HE WANTS YOU, HE WANTS YOU, HE WANTS YOU!!!


For ye are all the children of God by faith in Christ Jesus. Gal 3:26


We all should desire to want relationships with others, especially in the end times. The Bible says that we should be meeting “more and more”, it insinuates that our time together with other Christians should increase nearing the end, and that we should assemble as often as possible.

If you are currently in relationships in your life in which you feel “loved” but not “wanted”, take the time today to begin “building a bridge” with the people who you feel disconnected from. What does “building a bridge” mean? “Building a bridge”, is a term that we like to use to explain the act of reaching out to someone and offering them your hand to meet up and fellowship in relationship. For instance, asking someone out to coffee is “building a bridge”. What you are saying in essence is that you are trying to connect through the invite to coffee with someone else, building a bridge from you to them in which love and mutual respect can begin to flow freely. This does not happen overnight- but as long as you choose to build relationships instead of destroy them- you will begin to feel more and more connected with them as individuals, and they will now have a new relationship with you, a relationship built on love AND want (the desire to become connected).

No one desires to feel unwanted. No one wants to feel like a “castaway”. Grown children still want their parents to call them (just to check in), teenagers still want their parents to take them to church (and lunch afterward), Grandparents still want you to “stop by and visit”, and friends and neighbors still want the neighborhood BBQ to be at your place! Finding out the proper way to feel loved AND wanted comes from only one source JESUS. Everything else is just work and noise. I would challenge all who are reading this today to begin to see:


B. You can build successful bridges to open the doors of communications with others

C. Everyone wants you to build a bridge with them, you just have to decide to DO IT

D. With JESUS you can be loved AND wanted!


God bless you my friends as you go about your day today feeling that you are LOVED and WANTED by Jesus!

If you are in need of prayer, you can always reach me at jessica@wholeheartedministries.com. We agree with you the the Lord has His will, purpose and plan for your life! If you have never completely surrendered or asked Jesus to be your Lord and savior, invite Him in today- you will never be the same! “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” 2 Cor 5:17

CONGRATULATIONS JESSICA! Jessica Heilman the winner of the Taffi Dollar 2011 RADI Award  for her video entry in representation of living a radical and redefined life in Christ. You can learn more about this award and watch her WINNING video HERE.

You can keep in touch with Jessica and Wholehearted Minisrties at wholeheartedministries.com, on twitter, via facebook, through email subscription to articles, and directly through email at jessica@wholeheartedministries.com. Thank you for your support!




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