What To Do When You Are Married To A Dream Stealer: Part TWO

WHY CAN’T WE JUST GET DIVORCED?

“For I hate divorce!” says the LORD, the God of Israel. “To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty,” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies. “So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife.” Malachi 2:16 NLT

LIVING AT ODDS

Living at odds is by no means easy. When a husband and a wife are going in two different directions there is nothing BUT heartache. In researching divorce and statistics, it has come to light that the majority of marriages that end in divorce do so from the wife filing against her husband. Many choosing to “let their husbands out of the arrangement”, state irreconcilable differences, neglect, or abuse. Regardless of the issue, it is the women who are leading this charge to separate. It is the women who are filing for divorce.

So as a woman, what do you do? What can you do? Maybe you once had a happy marriage totally on the same page with each other, but then it seems like one day you come home and everything is going in opposite directions. The kids are in various activities, the husband is working long hours, and you are left at home wondering what the purpose of life is beyond folding laundry.  You feel like SOMETHING HAS TO CHANGE… and you know what- YOU ARE RIGHT!What kind of marriage is it, when a husband and wife do not know each other anymore? What kind of a life is it when as soon as an idea for change comes up… your spouse is right there to shoot it down?

The devil used Job’s wife to try and steal his dream:

“His wife said to him, ‘Are you still holding on to your integrity? Curse God and die!'”

 

Job and his wife were not on the same page. I always find it interesting that even though the Bible talks about all of Job’s children dying and all his riches vanishing, and his health failing… his wife never dies or leaves the picture.

Why is this? Here in Job 2:9, Job’s very own wife is telling him to die! And yet, Job does not leave her nor forsake her. the Bible says in Matthew 19:6 “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” When the Lord has joined a man and a woman together in marriage, they are now considered to Him ONE. He had specific instructions that the devil could not kill Job (this then also included Job’s wife- as they are one). “The LORD said to Satan, ‘Very well, then, he is in your hands; but you must spare his life.'” Job 2:6

All of Job’s children died, but not his wife. He did not consider divorcing his wife, because he understood that they were ONE. You and your spouse ARE ONE member.

What God has joined together, let man not separate.

MARRIAGE IS FOREVER, LOVE IS A CHOICE

I understand in writing this that each person has their own story, and feeling about divorce. I must however write this to the general public and in order to encourage my struggling brothers and sisters that marriage is a GOOD THING, and that you CAN get through all manner of trials and tribulations TOGETHER. We stand on the premise that MARRIAGE IS FOREVER, but love is a choice!

  • Can you LOVE someone you are at odds with? Jesus said, “Love your enemies” (Luke 6:35)
  • Can you RESPECT someone who has hurt you? Jesus says, “Lend to them without expecting to get anything back” (Luke 6:35)

Yesterday we talked about, people who have succeeded the ungodly way in life through making it their goal to quickly dismiss their adversaries, removing dream stealers at all costs. This is unfortunate.

Dismissing an adversary, is the same as running AWAY from an adversary.

As soon as a man and woman have entered into the marriage bed, it is NOT to be defiled. Leaving a spouse is in some regards as emotionally and spiritually crippling as leaving God Himself. That scripture in Matthew says, “What the LORD has joined together- let no man separate.” This means that your spouse was brought to you by God, and neither you nor any other human being has the right to separate that union.

OK, SO I AM STUCK MARRIED… NOW WHAT?!

In tomorrow’s article you are going to find some helpful tips on staying married happily, even though you and your spouse might be at odds. I have heard many stories in the last few years of marriages healed regardless of infidelity, abuse, drugs, pornography, and even lost love.

There are many men and women out there that are just like you (most worse off), and have and WILL choose to stay the course, wait it out and watch God do miracles in their marriages! They have learned how to love again!

Stay tuned tomorrow for our next article “What to Do When You Are Married to a Dream Stealer: Part THREE: So I am Stuck Married… NOW WHAT?”

 

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