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• Dealing With Mommy’s Hour of Condemnation… The Conde’mom’nation Hour.


This blog post taken from our sister website “


For me… it happens every night right as I am about to go to bed. Those nagging questions begin to flood in, you know the ones … “Am I doing enough? Did the kids brush their teeth? Should I work more on the calendar? Do I have a coffee date tomorrow? What am I making for dinner? Did I get the laundry done? What’s in the wash? What’s in the dryer? Will I be able to sleep through the night?…” It is almost as if we expect the “Siri” in our brain to answer all of our pestering questions and then go to work on them like a Genie in the lamp, leaving us to wake up refreshed and all our work finished while we sleep.

I have named this “The Conde’mom’nation Hour”. If when our babies were newborns they had “witching hours” – times of day when all they did was cry – I think we moms as we grow older in our parenting seem to develop a condemnation hour – same time every night. Right as we are trying to relax.

How is it we can WORK ALL DAY at doing our best; driving our kids to practice, making dinner, being there for our husbands… and then in an instantall our “good deeds” become forgotten and we are left questioning everything from our hip size to our house size? Honestly, I think it’s because as moms we have decided to become by day total CONTROL FREAKS.

Wow, that was a revelation right there. I normally don’t consider myself a control freak. And have only began thinking in terms of this as I write this post. I have SIX KIDS and everything to me is OUT OF CONTROL, like 99% of the time. I don’t like babies to have dirty faces (which they do), sit in dirty diapers (naturally), and I don’t like them wearing dirty clothes (of course). I don’t like dishes in the sink, or toys all over the floor. We live in 1000 sqft and if a towel is so much as left out in the open – it is as if you moved the couch into the center of the room.

I think the last eight years of living with eight people in a “quaint” space has made me a bit of a control freak. (YES I AM ADMITTING THIS) But is being “clean” controlling? I suppose it is, if I loose focus of myself and instead of cleaning up to serve others, I only clean up to stay busy keeping up appearances and in-turn become some sort of house drill Sergeant. Perhaps the Condemomnation Hour is a direct result of all the micro-controlling decisions I make ALL DAY LONG compiled into a MACRO self-condemnation moment right when I need to relax enough to fall asleep to get the energy I need to be “mom” all over again the next day.

Don’t get me wrong – I LOVE our house – I do not desire to move or uproot our family from the nest we have built. These last eight years have been amazing in the sense of discovering what is most important to our family. Today’s revelation seems to be the last and final piece to the puzzle of what it means to be in this Chapter in my life. The realization that condemnation only comes from two places – myself, and the devil. Yeah, I wrote about the nasty adversary who seeks to destroy.  All he wants is for me to feel like a BAD MOMMY, and when I am a control freak all day long and can’t control anything even into the night – I AM A BAD MOMMY. No one should go to bed feeling inadequate! No one should go to bed feeling the pain of condemnation!


First off we can take a deep breath and realize some stuff is just out of our hands. Not everything is going to get done before bed, sometimes our kids will forget to brush their teeth, sometimes we will too. The Bible says, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who love God and are called according to his purpose”. (Romans 8:1) I agree with that – and need to remember that more often. Jesus hasn’t condemned me for my sins… as a mater of fact in Him I won’t even be persecuted for my sins! Is not picking up a pair of undies off the floor an unforgivable sin? NO! So I have no right to treat it as one! Jesus loves me for me, not my spotless floors!

Secondly, we can understand these things are only temporal. As a mater of fact, the longer we work to remain clean and tidy (it’s a constant process) the tidier and cleaner we will get, and the tidier and cleaner we get as we grow – when our own children are up and grown – the tidier and cleaner we will have become. Then that day will come when they have up and moved out, and our houses will always be clean! This too shall pass!

As for tomorrow, I VOW to make tomorrow better. I will try to “control” less and GIVE more. I will go to bed without a bag of condemomnation weighing on my shoulders because I will defer to others some of the daily work, or simply allow it to get done in it’s own time.

Just as babies eventually grow out of their “witching hours” it is time for this mom to grow out of her “condemomnation hours”. Who’s with me?

• Is This Pie WHOLE?

Whole Pie


I have a rather provocative question… is this pie WHOLE? The answer… “Yes”. What makes it whole? Is it the fact that it isn’t missing any pieces? No, what makes this pie WHOLE, is that it is the end product of what the Baker had originally intended. In math if an image has all its parts (a pie for example), it is considered whole. If you take a piece away however…


In the book of John Jesus came across a man who had been ill for 30 years and unable to walk. What was Jesus’ first question to the man… “Will you be made whole?” (John 5:6) Jesus didn’t profess the man was healed until after the man decided that he would allow Jesus to help. Jesus is a gentleman and He will not force Himself on any man. The value we as readers need to see in this scripture is two fold:

  1. We were created in our ENTIRETY from the Creator. Just like the pie from the Baker, if we came out of our mother’s with the breath of life – we have been made in His Image. But what about the disabled? MADE IN HIS IMAGE. What about different races? MADE IN HIS IMAGE. It is only by way of the sin in this world that we are separated from God, and it is in this sin that unavoidably our pie is torn to pieces.
  2. Thanks to the sin in this world, our life experiences and the ignorant presumptions of others our wholeness becomes taken from us. It is only through our decision to forgive, let go, and allow the Lord to make us whole!

The World


When you consider all of the external influences in your life that have made an impression on your overall psyche, it is dizzying! Everyone everywhere taking a piece of your pie!

You have to CHOOSE to let Jesus do His work in you. In this picture the “you pie” is being torn in every direction and there is no glue that can put a cut pie back together. This pie would have to be SPIRITUALLY reassembled, just like new. A new creation.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Cor 5:17 


In a matter of 30 seconds or less you can make the decision to be “made whole”. As a blog writer one of my jobs is to read books and write reviews about the books that I have read, or am currently reading. (See yesterday’s post) A must have book that I have read recently: 30 Second Solution: Transform Your Body, Business, Relationship, and Life in Just Seconds at a Time by Ron Kardashian goes into great detail on the power our split second decisions make to our lives, how those decisions can make or break us – literally. The decision to allow the Lord to make you WHOLE takes only a matter of seconds – and those seconds can and will permanently change your life FOREVER.

“Jesus, I need you. I need wholeness in my life. I believe that you died and rose again, took my sin and because of you I am a new creation. I invite you to become the Lord of my life. Yes Lord, I receive you!”




If you have just prayed this prayer of salvation, or have rededicated your life to Christ Jessica would like to hear from you! You can email her here at:, subject line: I SAID YES!

• So, You Married Your Opposite – Now What?


When my husband and I first met we only saw our similarities… there were SO many! From the fact our first names both started with “J” to our dreams, goals, and desires. This made the whole “courtship” process of 3 months easily do-able. When you believe you are marrying the better version of you – where is the hesitation to come from? NO WHERE!

It wasn’t until around the three year mark that I realized how opposite we were. The way we were raised: Christian vs Non-Christian, Siblings vs No Siblings, Rented House vs Purchased House… etc, etc. It was as if the “love cloud” that had made all our similar parts the only thing we could see had evaporated and what was left was two complete strangers living in the same house!




It was upon this revelation that I was left with the decision to change things or just live miserably married. Divorce has never been an option for Jeff or I, as we decided to entirely remove it from our vocabulary (this is something I suggest all couples do). Just like in Robert Kiyosaki’s Rich Dad Poor Dad,  Jeff and I had seen Happily Married Unhappily Married with our Grandparents and Parents and we chose “Happily Married” – even if it meant we had to become students of marriage.

At the five year mark (it took a couple years of me being uncomfortable) I began a serious book reading regime on marriage alone. I took to an at home University and “home schooled” myself in the art of marriage! Here are some of the book titles I devoured:

  • The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
  • For Better of For Best by Gary Smalley 
  • Letters to Karen on Keeping Love in Marriage by Charles W Shedd
  • Personality Plus by Florence Littauer 
  • You Can if You Think You Can by Norman Vincent Peale
  • The Greatest Miracle in the World by Og Mandino
  • Self Love by Robert Schuller

Some of these titles as you can see are not “marriage” or relationship driven, but they are internal personality and over all psychology addressing. I believe WHOLEHEARTEDLY in what Brian Tracy (author of Focal Point a Proven System to Simplify Your Life, Double Your Productivity, and Achieve Your Goals) calls the “leverage of others knowledge”. If the wheel has already been created… why not drive in their car?



So I was reminded today (after nearly 18 years of marriage) about my husband and I and our differences (THANK GOD we are so different! He doesn’t “complete me” he makes me a BETTER me!) when I went to the bank. At the bank there is a big plastic bowl of lolipops and as our custom is, I ALWAYS pull out six of the same colored pop for our six children. ALL red, blue, etc. as to not induce strife. While I was carefully selecting ALL the pink ones (sometimes I laugh out loud at this fact alone considering the other people in line see this woman with hands full of pops) I couldn’t help but laugh because Jeff will ALWAYS pick six opposite colors when he goes to the bank! He thinks watching the kids negotiate and handle conflict is a hoot! It’s as if the challenge he watches them go through is so much better than the obvious peaceful alternative that I would present.


If this post today encouraged you to think about how the oppositeness of your spouse could actually be a strength instead of a weakness, consider saying to yourself “I’m a better me because he/she is the opposite of me.” Think about all the ‘scary’ things that you have been able to do since you have been married that you would have NEVER attempted if it weren’t for your “oppositeness”. Maybe you went to a fancy restaurant for the first time, tried a new food, went sky diving, or meet some new friends we really do have a lot to be thankful for in our opposing views! Think about how boring life would be if we were attracted to our exact replica! Yikes!

• Financial “Stewardship” What is it?


Just recently I was listening to a 10 year old ‘tape’ from a preacher in Texas. Yes, I said “tape.” What was amazing to me, was how relevant the tape was for being so old. The message was spot- on, and I was hooked.

The message was on that famous word that most of us “Christian’s” have all come to dread… STEWARDSHIP. Doesn’t the Word call us to be Stewards? “Faithful Servants”? Most of us cringe at the thought of having to serve God. Most of us don’t even know where to begin. The oddest thing, wasn’t that I was listening to a ‘tape’ or learning how to ‘serve’ again, the oddest thing was how excited this preacher was on becoming a ‘Steward for God’.

A ‘Steward for God’ ?

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:19-21

How in the world are we supposed to not store anything up? How are we to live by faith and not by sight when the rent is due, and the car needs gas, and the kids need milk in the morning? Doesn’t God know that it takes CASH to do anything in this world??

YES! Yes, He does. The only thing is… it doesn’t take your cash. It takes His.

What? God’s cash? Yes, God’s cash. The Word says, ”

The silver [is] mine, and the gold [is] mine, saith the LORD of hosts.” Hag. 2:8


So how do you go about not “laying” anything up? Don’t have anything to begin with!

I don’t have a checking account, I don’t have a house, I don’t have a car. Now don’t get me wrong, there are multiple checking accounts in my name, multiple cars, and perhaps someday multiple houses… but NONE of them are mine, and ALL of them belong to God the Father. I am merely a Steward to Him, and have received an inheritance from the Lord most High.

I go to bed penniless every night, and I wake up penniless every morning. My portfolio is the Lords, and the Lords alone. He built it, He created it. “Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it” Psalm 127:1 He is free to make withdraws whenever is necessary, and I am free to not be persecuted by the constraints that money and added maintenance can bring. It is all His, and He is awesome. I am merely His Steward.

steward: ˈst(y)oōərd: noun
1 a person who looks after the passengers on a ship, aircraft, or train and brings them meals.
• a person responsible for supplies of food to a college, club, or other institution.
2 a person employed to manage another’s property, esp. a large house or estate.
• a person whose responsibility it is to take care of something : farmers pride themselves on being stewards of the countryside.

I used to ask people, “What would you do if you won a million dollars?” Most people would say, “Invest, get out of debt, buy a house, retire.” Only a select few would say, “Nothing.” The interesting thing is that “Pray, and do whatever the Lord wants me to do” only comes out of the hearts of those that understand that it doesn’t and didn’t belong to them in the first place.

I can see living on the beach someday, and watching my children play in the sand and surf with their father. I can see writing manuscript after manuscript on God and His blessings, but most importantly I can see having all of this in absolute freedom. These are rewards for taking care of and seeing about the ‘Masters’ business, not my own.

In America we have a hard time understanding ‘Stewardship’, because we don’t understand how Kingdom principles work. In a Kingdom, there is one ruler, and all under His authority we are provided for and taken care of. In turn, He as a good and kind ruler, takes care to see that His people are feed, housed, clothed, and prepared to do what is necessary to keep the Kingdom operating efficiently.

The Body of Christ is NO different. We have One Ruler, One King. We are taken care of completely. You MUST recognize that in order to lay a hold of the principles of the Word of God, you must know that He is a jealous God (Deut. 5:9) and will not be able to give all into your hands as long as you will continue to take claim to something that does not belong to you. We must not covet what rightfully belongs to the King. There is no place in a Kingdom for someone who wants to overthrow the King. Especially, if that King is the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords! (Rev 19:16)

How much freedom is in ‘Stewardship’? Imagine having everything you could possibly need or want and your only responsibility is to do what the Master asks of you! How amazing is that! You mean I can have everything and the only thing I have to do is what God instructs me to do???


But what if God asks me to do something, I don’t want to do, or can’t do?

• “For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matt. 11:30
• “And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him.” Hebrews 11:6
• “since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” Col 3:24
• ” In Him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of Him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of His will, in order that we, who were the first to hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.” Eph 1:11

You don’t need ANY money to operate in this world, what you need is an inheritance. Money, cars, houses, clothes, food, relationships, recognize that the only way to receive it is if you receive an inheritance from the One who created it all!

God the Father wants to give it all to you to benefit from, and make sure that His Kingdom continues to operate efficiently. He is a God of Order and wants to give you your inheritance as if you were heir to the throne. Hey wait… YOU ARE!

“It was not through law that Abraham and his offspring received the promise that he would be heir of the world, but through the righteousness that comes by faith. For if those who live by law are heirs, faith has no value and the promise is worthless, because law brings wrath. And where there is no law there is no transgression. Therefore, the promise comes by faith, so that it may be by grace and may be guaranteed to all Abraham’s offspring—not only to those who are of the law but also to those who are of the faith of Abraham. He is the father of us all.” Romans 4:13-16

A prayer for today,
Father God thank you for Your Son Jesus who died on the cross, that we could be entered into this Sonship, that we could partake in this inheritance. Thank you for Your Son and His obedience and death to the cross and His blood that was shed on Calvary, that we can become stewards for You of everything that You would have for us. Apart from You, we are nothing, and yet with You we are EVERYTHING! The sacrifice that You made makes us whole, and today we say “Thank you, for taking away all of our cares and worries and for showing me today that as long as I see that everything that is entrusted to me is Yours… I know now that I can still be provided for, while not laying up! My treasure is in HEAVEN! Everything here, belongs to YOU! In Your Sons name, AMEN!

God bless you today, as you are free to succeed, understanding none of it is ours anyway!

As a community we welcome your comments and replies!

• You Are a Winner!



There is an old adage that says that “Slow and steady wins the race”. I don’t know about you, but I haven’t found that always to be true! After all in about every sporting event known to man, the fastest & strongest person always wins and in doing so they are celebrated for their strength!

Did you know that as a believer in Christ YOU too have that same strength that causes winners to “WIN”? You have a strength of Spirit that no one can deny!

Read 1 John 5:1-5 (MSG):

Every person who believes that Jesus is, in fact, the Messiah, is God-begotten. If we love the One who conceives the child, we’ll surely love the child who was conceived. The reality test on whether or not we love God’s children is this: Do we love God? Do we keep his commands? The proof that we love God comes when we keep his commandments and they are not at all troublesome. Every God-begotten person conquers the world’s ways. The conquering power that brings the world to its knees is our faith. The person who wins out over the world’s ways is simply the one who believes Jesus is the Son of God.

I just love this sentence: “The conquering power that brings the world to its knees is our faith.” Your faith! Your faith in Jesus Christ, your belief in Him makes you a winner!

The Bible says that “by faith” you have already won, and it also says that “through Christ” we have overcome the world! Isn’t that great news?!


Romans 8:37 (MSG) says:

“So, what do you think? With God on our side like this, how can we lose? If God didn’t hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn’t gladly and freely do for us? And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God’s chosen? Who would dare even to point a finger? The One who died for us—who was raised to life for us!—is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture”

There is no loosing for those who renew their minds to the Word of God! If you feel like a failure, look for scriptures on success. If your body is sick, look for scriptures on healing! If you’re tired, look for those scriptures that contain strength. You WILL find them! Everything you need has already been given to you… and YES! you have already won!